Saturday, January 06, 2007

Hard Decisions...

Faithful One
(by Selah)

I find no hope within to call my own
For I am frail of heart, my strength is gone
But deep within my soul is rising up a song
Here in the comfort of the faithful one

I walk a narrow road through valleys deep
In search of higher ground, on mountains steep
And though with feet unsure, I still keep pressing on.
For I am guided by the faithful one.

Faithful, faithful to the end,
My true and precious friend,
You have been faithful,
Faithful, so faithful to me

I see your wounded hands, I touch your side
With thorns upon your brow you bled and died
But there’s an empty tomb, a love for all who come
And give their hearts to you, the faithful one.

Faithful, faithful to the end,
My true and precious friend,
You have been faithful,
Faithful, so faithful to me

And when the day is dawned and when the race is run
I will bow down before God’s only Son
And I will lift my hands in praise for all you’ve done
And I will worship you, my faithful one.

This song was on one of the CDs I received for Christmas, and I've listened to it a lot between Christmas and now. I think I've been drawn to it, partially because it speaks a lot of truth to what my journey's been and I guess to where my journey's heading. I find comfort in this song...comfort in the fact He is so faithful to us, even when we aren't nearly as devoted or faithful to Him.

I said in my first post of the New Year that I don't make resolutions, but that I do try to have some hopes or goals, for which to work towards during the year. One of the goals on my list..."Make important changes in my a wife & mother, in ministry, schooling, etc." I'm already having to face the somewhat scary part of this one. For me, at this point, I think the only way I can truly make important changes in my life, is to clear my slate to pretty much empty. But in order to do that, it would mean giving up ministry stuff which I feel led by God to be involved in.

So the big question in my head today is this...if I clear my plate and step down from almost all ministry commitments, am I being disobedient to God, or simply making sure my heart and motivations are where they need to be?

I've never made a step quite so radical, as to simply take a few months to not serve, but simply be a spectator. It goes against everything in my mindset and how my heart's wired. So right now, the battle ensuing, is to discern whether or not this suggestion in my head is God-breathed or not.

I think the reason for the difficulty with this decision is because of the last verse of the song. There will come a day when we'll all stand before Him and give an account of what we did and didn't do, and also explain the reasons for those choices. I want to do all He wants of me...and in the end, I really don't right now if this decision will allow that or not.


Corry said...

Sounds like you are being overwhelmed, dear sister. But God has a solution for everything and will give what's needed when it's needed.

As far as your decision goes, maybe this will be helpful:
Always do what you know is right.
Never do what you know is wrong.
And if you don't know what to nothing (except for praying about it).

Praying God will lead you every step of the way and His blessings are upon all you do.


God's Grace.

Renee said...

Thank you so much for your visit on my blog and to take time to post a comment. Thank you for your kind appreciation of my blog too. I wish we can go sharing through our blogs and comments. God bless your week.

Christopher said...

what comfort we have in the one who holds us,